Errant Pirate Boy

The boy looked to be, say, 11. He had a length of 1×1 pine that was 3-quarters his height and he was pummeling—battling, probably—a snow bank with great enthusiasm. He stopped when he saw me coming and turned towards me.

He eyed me suspiciously—true suspicion, the kind that when it is directed at you is so pointed that you, too, are suspicious of yourself. What’s wrong with me? What ignominious deed have I done to be so mistrusted?

The boy reached his hand up to his black knit stocking cap and slowly, without breaking his suspicious glare, pulled the hat down over his left eye. Then he took his imaginary sword (which, I took note, was a very real and potentially bruisome stick) by the hilt with his right hand and sheathed it in his left, which he held against his waist, since that’s where sheaths go.

Staring at me cycloptically, he stood, legs apart, arms akimbo, still holding his weapon in both hands, as I approached him. There he was—a man ready at arms.

Looking back I wonder what story was playing out in his mind. Was this stranger walking toward him seeking to cross yon bridge and must forsooth pay a tax. Was I an enemy who needed to be slain lest I defile the maiden in yon crenelated tower? Was I an arrogant lord who did not understand the plight of this outlawed, yet noble, pirate?

I don’t know where his imagination had him, but I’ll admit that, in the moment I wasn’t wondering, because I honestly thought he was going to make an example of me in front of his imaginary minions.

We eyed each other—me, furtively; him with confident ferocity. He stood stock still as I passed by him and offered a slight nod—the same slight nod I give to intimidating adults who I pass. For a brief moment I believed I would feel the pine thwack of his fictional, yet furious, blade against my back.

But fortunately—or, alas, depending on your opinion of me—I survived my run-in with the boy. Unscathed, I left the lad behind me. And as I crossed 19th street, heading for safety, his ego altered and I heard him in the distance singing along with a black-capped chickadee.